Tiers and Tiers and Tears

If people are safer, if I know what is happening and why I can get my head round it.

Don't get me wrong when I say I don't mind - financially it is crippling. Not "darn it no fancy imperial stouts for Xmas" financially difficult, not "Hmm well if I jettison the 'hobbyist' staff, cut hours dramatically & turn off the heating we should be able to carry on" financially frightening but "Can I organise a debt payment plan to go with that (please don't take my house)?" crippling.

And yet that's OK - not because it isn't terrifyingly hard - but because you can plan for a future and you know (believe..hope?) that it is part of a process that allows new systems to be put in place to keep people alive.

Lockdown is exhausting.

Lockdown is bad for mental & physical health.

Lockdown is not a solution.

But it could be a breathing space, room to plan, a step towards something else.

If Covid were a serious wound, lockdown should be applying pressure to reduce the bleeding while you wait for an ambulance. You don't take your hands off just to see if it's still pouring blood you wait til a professional has the kit to do some serious patching up, then you transfer to an even better setting with more professionals all working together to fix it. Nor should an amateur apply a tourniquet if professionals are on the way...

I'd rather keep the pressure on while I waited for stitches than pop a new plaster on to see if the gushing stops.

I don't mind lockdown but yeah I'm not massively keen on all the shilly-shallying somewhere around in between and switching backwards and forwards.

Is the step away from lockdown helping?

I have reminded a few people that dead people don't buy pints. Complain all you like about social distancing being bad for the economy and how annoying it is for you in your prime and statistically pretty safe anyway thanks but your visit today isn't as important as whether those 5 tables over there can come back next week.

I hate the whole process of working out where we stand and how that relates to everything else.

I hate feeling like I need to compromise so someone else doesn't have to - yeah it's boring socialist stuff to suggest that if everyone gives up a bit maybe some people aren't giving up everything. Maybe I just feel like we aren't the only ones on the sharp edge and we can share the punches.

I don't want to open up for food at the expense of music and theatre. I don't want to open for 30secs of gratification versus 10 mins of meaningful conversation.

I want the pub to mean something i want it to be safe and I want the government to care about that and not just how much tax I owe you.

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